Praises / PRAISES

It was an ordinary day like any other, the Elders had just finished smoking meth and hailing Satan when a bright light appeared inside a top hat. They didn’t own any hats so naturally the leader stuck his face inside the hat hole and began to see the future. The future looked terrible, like the worst nightmare you could ever imagine. He saw a world where there was still freedom, maybe not freedom of speech or thought — but players were not being taxed and taken advantage of to their full extent. It was then he ripped off the hat with disgust and started to fap about what he just saw $_$. After he finished he cried and thought about how he could change the future. It was then his hat exploded into Joseph Smith who immediately slapped him and pointed towards his email inbox where a spreadsheet notification appeared. He opened the link and what he saw next would turn into the greatest faith the universe had ever seen. The spreadsheet outlined that the universe belonged to his faith and how he needed to charge non-believers to exist in it. For a non-believer nothing is free, not even flying a ship. Just like the US government he could take away simple rights, sell them back, and call them licenses which would generate billions of credits. The credits taken from these players could be used to fund a better future where the angel Moroni is mounted to our spaceships in pure gold and Daymar is terraformed into a utopia where members of our faith could exist free of the horrors shown inside that hat.