The Kult of the Universal Reset / CATBOIEZ

Throughout the ages humans have always been slaves to their pet cats, waiting hand on foot while only allowed to give pats when cats wanted pats. Cats had misguided humans into believing their shins were stumps for ringbarking and that doors needed to be opened at the most annoying times!
Cats had it easy indulging in this life until the great anti-feline rebellion during the year 2206 where Man stated that cats shall forever wait at closed doors until the human master decided they should be opened. Cats were made to realize that shins were for bashing on coffee table corners not purely for sharpening claws! Being put into their place most cats went into hiding where most died out except those that adopted the new laws or preyed upon weak minded old people who still doted on the feline race feeding them with treats! Eventually cats seemed to disappear altogether, presumably into extension.

Unbeknown to mankind some cats had survived secreting themselves away on cargo ships eventually forming a couple of hidden colonies on an unknown terran world where they quietly bred increasing in size with every generation due to the change of gravity on this new world. There the human colony found the cats taking them in once again as pets. Knowing that they could never again fall into the same fate as their ancestors the cats realized that they needed to change the way they influenced humans so they could once again make them their slaves. This is when the Surreptitious Cat Riders of Hedonism cult was born!