Hong Kong Port Authority [HKPA] - Organizations

History

Following Humanity’s rapid expansion into the Galaxy in 2530, simple aquatic port management became dull and unprofitable. The mighty and glorious Hong Kong Port Authority decided our only option was to head to the stars, retaining our name out of respect to our humble origins.

This was a profitable decision, and we grew greater and wealthier by the year, eventually becoming one of the first Great Shipping Powers. In 2796, unfortunately, tragedy struck. In a staggering piece of bad luck, our entire glorious base of operations was wiped out when the now-ancient Voyager 2 probe (launched from Earth in 1977) smashed into it travelling at an estimated .5% the speed of light.

The probe had been gaining velocity for nearly a thousand years by slingshotting itself through the gravity wells of large planets and stars, entirely by accident, never once colliding with anything or falling into a stable orbit. Finally, in an event the odds of which our statisticians flat-out refused to calculate, it smashed into our headquarters, located on a moon in the Stanton system. The resulting explosion released an estimated 7.5e26 Joules of energy, destroyed nearly half the moon, and terminated the employment of approximately one and a quarter milion valued laborers. This effectively shut down business operations.

Not to be bested by the cruel hands of fate, our brilliant Directors of Marine rallied the survivors scattered across the galaxy and told them it was time for a new course of action. In the immortal words of Messipus;

Fuck you, space. You’re OUR bitch now.

Manifesto

The Hong Kong Port Authority was founded to ensure the safe conduct of shipping in the Port of Hong Kong on Earth, and later, several major ports in Space.

Then Space kicked us in the teeth, so the Directors of Marine came together and decided that it was time for a new course of action. No longer content to simply shuttle cargo around safely and efficiently, trapped in our offices and control towers, we are now taking a more hands-on approach to shipping and traffic guidance.

Services now available to our clients, willing or unwilling, include (but are not limited to) the location, retrieval, smuggling, salvaging, assassination, theft, and inspection of cargo, ships, and sentient beings of all shapes and sizes.

These services are performed pro-bono, at will, as a charity to the community we have served for many, many generations with little to no thanks. As always, we seek to Promote Excellence in Marine Services.

Charter

THE FOLLOWING, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, ARE THE RULES OF THE HONG KONG PORT AUTHORITY, TO BE ADHERED TO BY ALL MEMBERS AT ALL TIMES

All members are to display a “Yes, I can” attitude during all Marine Services. Follow up questions are to be given the response “Because I have a gun.” Further questions are to be given the response “Live-Fire Exercise”. Any member who fails to follow these Customer Service Guidelines will be Summarily Executed.

All members of the Hong Kong Port Authority are expected to provide thorough and complete Marine Services, performing all actions he or she deems necessary to provide for the safe and efficient flow of cargo and ship traffic. Any member failing to meet the Arbitrary and Most Secret Quota will be Summarily Executed.

All members will keep in mind at all times that since the destruction of our corporate headquarters, this is a No Serious Business work environment. Members engaged in Serious Business will be Summarily Executed.

Cowardice is unbecoming, and brings dishonor upon us all. Without our prolific Commercial Empire, Honor is our most valuable resource. All members are expected to throw themselves into combat with a vigor that befits our proud heritage. Any member who is deemed guilty of “being a bitch” will be Summarily Executed.

Hong Kong Port Authority / HKPA

History

Manifesto

Charter