The Gentleman Losers / SPACELOSER

TRANSCRIPT EXCERPTED FROM UNSECURED SPECTRUM VIDFILE ENTITLED ‘business pitch (don’t watch!)’ DATA NODE 33.21B.AEA7

TRANSCRIPT BEGINS

Hi there, I’m Brick Hardcastle. You might remember me from such Spectrum vid hits as “Warriors From Beyond Sirius” and “Jax Madsen, Terror of the Vanduul”. Wow, it seems like only yesterday when I was headlining the Stellarum Science Fiction Film Festival, but those days are long behind me now. Today I lead some of the finest private individuals in a quest to provide citizens and corporations of the UEE the kind of services that you just can’t trust to large, established professional firms. Oh, sure, you might buy a lot with their inflated rates – high-caliber equipment, advanced knowledge, professionalism – but do you really need all of that to get your needs met in a timely basis?

Of course you don’t. And that’s where we come in.

Here at TGL, we pride ourselves on being able to tackle some of the most difficult tasks in the universe. Our staff of cargo haulers, explorers, and armed security specialists are capable of handling your most difficult assignments, such as:

• Cargo hauling in well-secured trade lanes
• Double-checking explored territory for maximum surety
• Security at family events such as children’s parties and funerals
• Looking after cherished loved ones, such as grandparents and the comatose
• Pet delivery
• And much, much more!

Yes, in a busy universe like today’s, who can handle all of the vital tasks that need to be dealt with on a regular basis? Certainly not you – and that’s where TGL comes in. Our dedicated staff of network handlers are ready to accept your Spectrum transmissions to secure an appointment today. After all, why overpay for services that we can provide at a rate slashed so deeply that your in-laws will think you’re really saving for a college education for your least favorite child? Don’t waste your time with the best around. That’s what we are here for.

TGL. Give us a try…and let us try for you.

[audio pauses ten seconds]

Uh, how was it? Was it okay? I’m not really sure if—

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